


last winter i gave you my heart

by midnightlou



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Dorks in Love, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Guide Shirabu Kenjirou, Haikyuu Secret Santa 2019, Hiking trip, Hokkaido, Like there is a lot of snow, M/M, Mention of Death, Passion for Space, Past Abuse, Shenanigans, Snow, They are a bunch of idiots, rarepair hell, sap, sassy characters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-30
Updated: 2019-12-30
Packaged: 2021-02-27 05:47:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22032031
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/midnightlou/pseuds/midnightlou
Summary: "Well, don't you have anything? You should use this break as needed.""Except your nerves, no, nothing else," Shirabu replied.or, Kuroo and Daichi are soon-to-wed and they decide to go on a trip with their friends Oikawa, Sugawara and Yahaba. Salty guide, snowstorms and conversations at night ensue.
Relationships: Kuroo Tetsurou/Sawamura Daichi, Minor or Background Relationship(s), Shirabu Kenjirou/Yahaba Shigeru
Kudos: 24





	last winter i gave you my heart

**Author's Note:**

> Here's my piece for #SecretSantaHaikyuu2019 ! 
> 
> This was made for @yahashiras, I hope you'll like it ! I tried to explore the dynamics of those rarepairs and I'm sorry if they are out of character at some point ! I knew you wanted not too much angst but I couldn't resist, I'm sorry (again). 
> 
> It was my first time writting a fanfic in english and I couldn't have do so without the help of Rae (@SHUlCHIS) ! Thank you for helping through the writer block and for beta-reading the whole thing (honestly you wrote this almost as I did). 
> 
> Enjoy lads !

"What are those goggles?"

The winter sun was low in the sky and the wind, gentle but freezing. The night before, the eternal snow had just started to cover the ground making it almost impossible to drive up there. In the distance, some loud chattering could be heard with giggles and screams of children’s names. But, everything felt like a quiet and calm place for Yahaba. Even his cheeks reddened - thanks to the cold wind - couldn’t take away the feeling of peace.

"What? Don’t you like it?"

"Well, you just look like a clown, Kuroo, but it’s none of my business I guess."

"Your words deeply wound my pride, Suga."

He didn’t bother to look, but Yahaba was sure Sugawara had just rolled his eyes as his friend’s answer while a smile found a way on his face. After all, the reason they had all agreed to come here was because they were close friends of the to be wed. Kuroo Tetsurou and Sawamura Daichi had gotten engaged three weeks ago; their high-school rivalry had evolved into a true _love story_. They had graduated from college nine months ago, which meant most of their finances had gone into a new flat, accomodations and, ofcourse, booze. In the end, there was not either the time or money left for a proper marriage ceremony. So, they had agreed on this trip in the cold, the snow and the quiet to celebrate their engagement. Kuroo had bragged about the benefits of this trip every chance he had gotten; they would create _unbreakable_ bonds, share _unbelievable_ stories and express their goodbyes before returning to a more _serious_ life. In a way, it was kind of a bachelor party in the cold, the snow and the quiet. 

A bachelor party in the mountains. 

With hiking. 

Some of the guests had laughed at the idea - of course, it was ridiculous - but in the end, they all had accepted.  That’s why, standing in front of the lodges, a group of young men were freezing, tightening their winter coats around themselves. 

Daichi was making his way back towards them, pocketing his phone as their banter quieted down. "Okay, I just hung up with the guide for our stay. He will be here soon."

"Wasn’t he supposed to be here already?" Sugarawa pointed out. 

At that, Oikawa started to mutter. "Maybe Tetsu-chan and Daichi-kun set a trap for us in those woods and plan on chopping us…"

"Sometimes l pity you for whatever is going on in your mind."

"Oh oh, Yahaba-chan, no need to be this salty just because you had to sit in the middle in the car !”

It was his turn to sigh and roll his eyes, a little smile on his lips. For a brief moment, Yahaba really wondered _why_ he had accepted Daichi's invitation to come here with all of them. But, the bitter memory made him lose his smirk. However, before he could have any time to dwell on his sadness, a red snowmobile roared and stopped right in front of them. Their guide, Yahaba supposed that was who it was, had copper-colored hair that was parted unevenly into two sides, brown-grey eyes, and a small build. His face became fully visible after he ended rattling snow from his hair. He wore an indifferent expression but his eyes were shining due to the snow, giving Yahaba the impression that he wasn’t _so_ bored. 

"Sorry gentlemen for being late. Welcome to Daisetsuzan National Park. I’m Shirabu Kenjirou, your guide for your stay. I will show you to your lodge before explaining all the rules and how we are going to proceed."

They all greeted him in return, Daichi wearing an eager expression and everyone pretending to not hear Oikawa’s whispered answer - _"Proceed for a magic spell?"_.

Soon enough, they started to follow the guide to one of the lodges. Yahaba was walking behind everyone, listening to Sugawara and Oikawa chat about Asahi Mountain and its mysteries while Daichi was enthusiastically speaking with their guide. Kuroo stayed behind with him, walking slower than usual. 

"We didn’t invite you only to let you have a change in setting, you know. We really want you here, so try to lighten up a little bit, Yahaba-chan." Before he could mutter a reply, Kuroo was already gone in _two_ long strides. Yahaba glanced at the scenery behind them and a little smile appeared on his lips. 

Maybe he could do this and enjoy the opportunity.

No, he couldn't. 

Yahaba was walking behind, his eyes fixed on the backs of his said friends. They had left soon after having unpacked their things and choosing their room for the following night. Of course, Kuroo and Daichi had gotten the suite; it was cosy, charming and very close to those movies sceneries. But, it had left Yahaba to share the lounge and the sofa bed with _Sugawara_ and _Oikawa_.

His forehead vein had started to pulse after hearing, "Yahaba-chan will sleep between the two of us, it's fine Daichi-kun! Don't worry!" And, _of course_ , Sugawara had added,"Yeah, it's perfect, guys".

No. Nothing was perfect. Because, now, Yahaba had difficulty breathing after their one hour walk. Sports had become a luxury he couldn't afford anymore while trying to complete his final year in college. He had papers to submit and a _thesis_ \- of all things - to finish in two months. And without Kuroo sharing the same flat as him, he didn't have any sport support. 

So, _yes_ , in a nutshell, Yahaba had gotten lazy. 

And maybe, it wasn’t exactly Kuroo's fault. 

A voice suddenly put an end to his gloomy thoughts."Hey, why are you sulking at the back?"

"Uh?!" Yes, okay, maybe he jolted a little bit. But, he’d always managed to get completely lost in his thoughts, it was no surprise he’d done just that right now, in a national snowy park in the middle of nowhere. 

"Are you alright? You haven’t said a word since we left." It was the impassive guide, Shirabu - if he remembered correctly. Yahaba could tell the guy deeply loved his work; he had told them all the rules to follow while hiking with this little smile on his face. It wasn't a condescending or obnoxious smile; no, it was more of a _passionate_ smile. Plus, the guy had kept his chill even after Oikawa's teasing and Sugawara's picky questions. So, Yahaba could at least grant him that - who knows how much time he spent _trying_ to keep those two out of his hair. 

"Shouldn’t you be walking ahead?" _Good job Yahaba, really smooth,_ he thought. 

"I know this mountain by heart now, I can guarantee you there is nothing to worry about." Though, his little smile seemed to flatter. Yahaba internally cussed at himself. Without wanting to worsen the situation, he kept his mouth shut, rather choosing to focus on Kuroo’s retelling of how he had broken his arms _five times_ \- a story he had probably heard more than _three times_ already. 

"So, why are you sulking?" 

"I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

"Well, you kind of have this grim aura going around you? I mean…" Feeling his cheeks heating up, Shirabu shut his mouth. That's why he wasn't in charge of tourists usually, he was socially _awkward_. "I don’t want you to cry when we get higher, what if your eyes freeze?" Shirabu had always scolded Goshiki for telling this urban legend to newcomers and, yet, he had just done the exact same thing. 

Yahaba didn't seem impressed. 

A silence passed between them. 

And then a chuckle. 

"I'm sure if it happens _you_ 'll be here with something up your sleeve, Shirabu-san."

And with that, they started to walk faster to catch up with the others. Also, they started chatting about urban legends; Yahaba dismissing every silly myth told by the guide. Before he knew it, Yahaba could see their next stop as Shirabu informed them. He tried to reach for his phone in his coat pocket but the gloves were a handful. Shirabu put an end to his supplice, flashing his watch under his nose, followed by a little wink. 

Before he got time to mind the blush on his cheeks, the guide was really raising his voice to let the others know they will stop as planned. And then the cobalt hair was at the front of the pack in quick strides. 

"Maybe you should try believing in a legend or two, _pretty Tokyo boy_." He had whispered to him with a thick accent before leaving. 

Yahaba's blush got deeper. 

He didn't imagine things could get worse. They had been walking for two hours before stopping to take a much needed break. Breathless and sweaty, Yahaba had watched how everybody had taken seats on cold rocks and snowy tree trunks.

Of course, Kuroo and Daichi were seated together on a tree trunk. The raven was actually trying to steal Daichi's snacks while the latest tried to keep it way from him. But, nobody was fooled by hisbehavior; everyone knew that Daichi had packed enough snacks for the both of them - and not to mention those were Kuroo's favorites. 

His other two companions were seated on the rocks. Oikawa was mocking Sugawara's attempt to sit on the cold, and muddy, rock. His laugh covered the other man's threats to end Oikawa's career if "he didn't stop his fucking bullshit". 

Only Shirabu remained on the last tree trunk, seated on a thin blanket provided for the purpose of not dirtying one's clothes. Without too much effort, Yahaba understood the only seat available was right next to their guide. And, apparently, Shirabu knew it too, his condescending smile flashing on his face. 

Yahaba rolled his eyes but didn't say a word while sitting down next to their guide. He noticed that his goggles were put on the top of his head, allowing him to get a proper look at his eyes. He didn't want to stare - he swore he wasn't! - but the brown of his eyes were this particular shade that was brilliant, vivid and complicated. The brown and grey just seemed to dance together inside his pupils. When Yahaba realized he was staring, he quickly diverted his gaze, his cheeks burning _again_. 

Shirabu only chuckled. 

_Again_. 

_That bastard_. 

"Don't you have anything to eat? You should use the break as needed." The guide asked, maybe to ease the tension or to play with Yahaba's nerves more. Because, the copper-haired man must have noticed his blush, the sweat present on his face and his uneven breath due to the exhaustion. 

His gaze didn't manage to cross the guide's. "I'm too afraid of the potential thieves." Yahaba nodded towards the bickering Oikawa, who Sugawara had managed to push into the snow. 

"I see, you must have some premium-quality snacks if you are that afraid, _Princess_." 

Yabaha couldn't stop himself from being taken back, _did he just-?_ He quickly managed a neutral tone, deciding that his blush didn't have anything to do with their salty guide. "Well, don't you have anything? You should use this break as needed." 

"Except your nerves, no, nothing else," Shirabu replied.

Yahaba turned his head quickly in the direction of the other guy. There, he could notice how his lips were pulled in a cocky smirk. A few seconds passed, Yahaba wondering how he _couldn't_ have predicted this, after all, the puns were his might. A grin flashed on his own lips before he glanced back to his friends. 

"Sorry, but we are out of stock. Come back tomorrow maybe." It was Yahaba's turn to smirk at Shirabu. It has been quite some time without him throwing retorts and bickering all day with his friends. Yahaba couldn't remember when the shift happened but he realized how much he had missed it - and _how much he had lost his touch._

Finally, Yahaba brought out his snack. As soon as the sounds of a wrapper opening made itself heard, Oikawa was looking towards him, a malicious smile painted on his face. "Yahaba-chan, darling, I was sure you won't forget about me!" And, soon enough, Suga was also starting to look at him with expectancy. 

A sight later and Yabaha was throwing another unopened bag of the same snacks at Oikawa's face. He didn't answer neither to their thanks nor Shirabu's- _"I knew it"_ -chuckle. He would never admit he got extra packets just for them.

They finally reached their lodge, they finally had time to shower and Yahaba was finally lying on the sofa, resting his sore muscles and his spirits from their sharp guide. Could someone remind him why he agreed to go on this trip to the mountain with this bunch of sporty guys? 

His arm was covering his eyes, trying to rest while Oikawa was taking a shower while singing awfully loud, it could be heard in the living room. Sugawara was laying next to him, playing on his phone or sending a text, Yahaba couldn't guess with only the sounds of his fingers. His silver-haired friend was humming the same song as Oikawa. In the background, when Oikawa dared to breath between lyrics, they could hear Daichi and Kuroo's laughters. 

Maybe they weren't the best, but they were his friends after all. And their shenanigans were the only thing that could make him feel safe and at home. 

When Oikawa got out of the bathroom, Sugawara suddenly jumped to his feet. He raised his arms and the sound was heard before Yahaba could process what was happening. But, when he opened his eyes and noticed his two friends fighting with damp towels as if they were swordsmen, an incredulous smile made its way on his face. 

Yahaba was trying to find his phone to record the whole scene when a roar was heard. It was only two seconds later when he understood that Daichi had joined with his own pillows. And, sadly, he didn't have time to find his phone; Kuroo had already got him under his arm and was running into their fight with his own pillow. 

They were laughing, screaming -squeaking for Oikawa- and throwing lazy punches for sure. Yahaba had joined their war, tickling Sugawara until he was spread on their sofa. "E-E-Enough Ya-chan!"

Suddenly, Kuroo fell on them after Daichi pushed him, his high pitched scream surprising everyone. Yahaba and Sugawara's breath was cut short for an instant from the impact. But Oikawa, who had just shoved Daichi too, stood over them, flicking his hair. "Look like I'm the winner again, ahahah!"

None of them bothered agreeing before Daichi pulled the last one down on top of them. The added weight made everyone spread on the sofa in weird positions, filling all the available space. Yahaba had Sugawara's elbow on his forehead and probably Kuroo's feet poking at his ribs. Daichi's thighs were also near his face but he didn't dare make any remark; _the sight was very much appreciated._ Finally, Oikawa's chin was perched on his abdomen. And, under this pile made of idiots, Yahaba started to laugh. He started to laugh, nearing the tears. He genuinely laughed for the first time in months. 

His laughter was so loud that he didn't notice his friends going silent and looking at him with pure happiness.

It was only after a few more laughs, tickles and declarations of victory, that Sugawara suddenly spoke. "Daichi, I think you're stepping on my dick right now."

And they laughed again, after Daichi profusely excused himself and shifted a little bit. 

After they had finally dared to move, the newlyweds had returned to their private room and Oikawa and Sugawara turned the tv on. Yahaba could hear them chatting over their favorite tv-show and how much their favorite character was better than the other's. The sound helped him to relax, seated in one of the deck chairs outside the lodge. His cigarette was dangling at his fingertips, hands tucked in warm gloves. Looking at the quiet scenery, Yahaba couldn't stop the odd feeling that was growing inside his ribs. 

He had fun with his friends and he had really missed those times with them. His music was turned on full blast in his earphones, he didn't hear the sound of steps getting closer. It was only when someone took a seat in the desk chair next to him that he startled loudly. 

Shirabu burst in laughter. 

"Oh my god! You scared the hell out of me!" His cigarette which had fallen from his grasp, was now damp in the snow. His hand was covering his quickly beating heart and his rosy cheeks were lit by the moon. 

"Sorry, Princess, but I wanted to tear you away from your pop paradise." Shirabu made a sign in the direction of his earphones and the sound of Lana Del Rey coming through. "Thought you'd be more into heavy metal though."

Yahaba rolled his eyes before getting a new cigarette. He didn't say anything; his mood ruined from his little bubble being torn apart. Shirabu didn't say a word either, looking in the same direction as him.

The quiet was welcomed and, surprisingly, enjoyable. Far from being awkward, it was as if they were bathed in the glowing light of the stars. Tentatively, a little smile started to grow on Yahaba's lips, getting him back to his melancholic headspace. The moon was bright, shining high in the sky due to their position on the mountain and the snow had stopped falling. Under their heavy coats, the two men didn't seem to mind the silence and absence of motion. 

After a while, Yahaba took a little breath. "I…" But, before he made the mistake of confessing his past to a perfect stranger, he shut his mouth tight. He didn't dare look at Shirabu, his gaze was fixed on the landscape before him. He could feel the other's gaze fixated on him, maybe scrutinizing him. Quickly, Yahaba tried to find a topic of conversation, anything but his own tragic backstory. The idea of going back inside had evencrossed his mind. But… how could he give up on this beautiful moment? After all, he had found some peace in this place in only one day. "I love to think about the fact that those stars are showing us the past."

"I find it pretty sad, don't you?"

"Sad?"

"Yeah, after all.. Some of those stars doesn't exist anymore. Yet, we can still see them and-"

"No, it's not sad at all. On the contrary, I believe that it's really beautiful. Those stars… some of them have already turned to waste but they can still shine here, and on further planets."

"What do you mean?"

"You know that we are seeing the past only because the light beams take plenty of light years before reaching our eyes, right? Well, that means if other beings are living on planets further away, the light beams would need even more time to reach them. And then… those stars are able to live in other's eyes longer."

Shirabu stopped glancing at the sky to look at Yahaba. He carefully noticed how his chin was slightly raised towards the night sky, the way his hair grazed his face and the shine in his deep maroon eyes. And for a moment, Shirabu felt all the sadness, the melancholy and the nostalgia bottled up in this frail body almost as if he was delicate. But, Shirabu couldn't depict how the sight turned him upside down. 

This night, when Yahaba finally returned to his lodge and found a place between Oikawa's and Sugawara's sleeping bodies, Shirabu thought he finally figured it out. Yahaba was in love with those stars as much as he loved the mountains andsnow. Yahaba probably knew a lot more about stars, maybe he was even majoring in this field. 

The sight of Yahaba stargazing overwhelmed him because Yahaba was glowing as those stars. 

Yahaba was trying to find his way through the universe. And he was quietly failing. 

Yahaba wondered how things had gotten out of hand so quickly. 

They had gotten ready smoothly. Sugawara had cooked them a wholesome breakfast while Oikawa kept playing Christmas songs on their TV. Kuroo had eaten his breakfast sitting on Daichi's lap, feeding him a little bit of his food. The mood had been good, light and even cheerful. 

They had met Shirabu to go on a new hiking trip. It was supposed to be longer; they were supposed to sleep at a shelter this night before hiking again and reaching the tip of the mountain. The sight was supposed to be breathtaking and they had packed little necessities so as not to be bothered by the weight while they made the hike. 

The hiking ascension had gone rather smoothly between puns, hazardous anecdotes and bickering between all of them. But, at some point, Shirabu had stopped in his tracks and frowned at the sky. He had called for a break and took out his radio. The city boys didn't think much of it, barely understanding a word of his little chat with his coworkers. And suddenly, everyone had gone quiet. 

"Fuck, Tendou, I swear I can see the snow getting there! And it's not going to be nice, I promise it to you! Believe me for once!"

Oikawa had stopped eating Yahaba's snack and Sugawara had gulped rather loudly. 

After more arguing from Shirabu and frowning from Daichi, the radio had gone silent after a little "copy" from their guide. He had cleared his throat lightly. Daichi, who had gotten back to his protective role, had been ready to press answers out of him. But he didn't have to, Shirabu told them everything. 

A snowstorm was coming. And the station didn't agree with him on the topic - explaining why they had the right to go up this morning. But Shirabu was sure: the signs were not lying. 

Then, it had been decided that they would take refuge in a cave that Shirabu knew about. There was no way they could make it on time to the shelter. It would have been too dangerous. 

Nobody dared to disagree. Shirabu had been living in Hokkaido his whole life and he had been working in Daisetsuzan since his 18. He knew. 

That's how they found themselves stuck in the depths of a quiet cave. Shirabu was confident; they would not be able to feel the cold or the wind from here. Nobody had dared asking how he could be so sure. 

Thankfully, Shirabu had noticed the upcoming snowstorm just before nightfall - which comes rather quickly at those heights. They barely made it to the cave in time and huddled together. Kuroo had his big arms wrapped around Daichi's middle, seizing the opportunity to steal all of his warmth. Oikawa and Yahaba were glued to Sugawara's sides, refusing to leave his embrace. In the meantime, Shirabu found a way to make a fire with his equipment and -surely- from his experience. They all had watched him silently unpacked his food supplies for them. And they all silently thanked him for his foresight. 

Minutes had started to tick by without any certitude on the time. Shirabu had strongly advised them to not look at their watch or phones; it would only make them feel more desperate. Instead, Kuroo took the opportunity to break the silence, his can in one hand. "Well, I hope that this is not an omen for our future together."

Daichi quickly elbowed him for his comment. "If you want to joke around, don't try to put it on our shoulders."

"Aw, babe, I know how much you want everything to go happily between us but maybe…"

"Shut up, Tetsu. Snow doesn't mean anything." At the firm tone of Daichi's voice, he didn't have any choice other than to bury his grin in his lover's hair. 

"Well, you know, Kuroo, snow here is known to be eternal. I think you should see this at a good omen if anything." Yahaba pointed out to his friends with a little smile. After all, they all could understand how much this situation could be stressful for them. 

"Wow, Yahaba-chan, I never thought you'd be the one to try to lift up our spirits…" Oikawa grinned while poking at Sugawara's can of food. 

"If you keep this up, I'll try to lift something else up and you're not going to like it.." Yahaba narrowed his eyes in the direction of the brunette. 

"Ohoh kinky, Ya-chan!" Yahaba noticed Shirabu's blush before he could respond to Oikawa's bullshit. Taken aback, he couldn't find the strength to answer something, mesmerized by the cute display of their guide. Sugawara and Kuroo's snickering were the only answer Oikawa received. 

Before any more teasing could be processed, Sugawara suddenly got everyone's attention. "Hey, I have an idea! Since we are stuck here for basically.. the entire night, why don't we reveal something about ourselves? You know… only the cave will remember this extra-bonding moment while the rest of us will never speak a word of it!"

"What a wonderful idea, Suga-chan, I-"

"Suga! What if Shirabu-san doesn't want to hear about all your rusty lives?"

"Actually, Princess, I don't mind."

Yahaba heard Kuroo choking on his food and Oikawa laughing into Sugawara's shoulder. Even Daichi stuffed a laugh behind his hand. His cheeks burning, Yahaba throw a dirty look at their guide who only had a playful and honest smile for him in response. 

"Well, now that it's settled, Kuroo, you start!"

"Uh… As you all know, I'm deeply in love with Daichi here and I can never be thankful enough to have found him and that he loved me back."

"Noooo, Kuro-chan! This is so lame, of course we all know that! Suga-chan said you must say something surprising."

"Oikawa, fuck you!How dare you interrupt my-" 

"Actually, I agree with you Oikawa. Tetsu, you should put more thought into it. You were the one bragging about special bonding time." Daichi interrupted, surprising quite everyone. "So I will start. Um, I have been together for a long time with Tetsu, we even hated each other's guts before but.. I have never felt so entitled by somebody else. This is a weird feeling, maybe a little hard to give in to at first, and I regret being too stiff about it sometimes. But the truth is, I have always cherished what we have, and I never want to have this with someone else. I think… I think I would even want to adopt a beautiful child with you and why not watch them grow up. They could even get some of your humor, I will not mind because sometimes you know how to be funny."

Daichi lowered his head, looking flustered and embarrassed. Loud outbursts were not close to his comfort zone but he tried. And they all knew that. None of them said anything at first, caught in the beauty and intimacy of the moment.

"I would like to thank you. Actually, to thank all of you." Kuroo began. "I didn't think I would be able to make it this far. But I have met some amazing people who have been there for me, even during my darkest times. Without all of you, I wouldn't have tried to fix my anger issues. I think, without all of your support, I would have given up and gotten into the yakuza or something. Thanks to you guys I can finally feel alive, loved and safe. And particularly, thanks to you," He nuzzled Daichi's shoulder. "I feel like a new man. And yes, I would love to adopt a child with you. With you around, I'm sure they will know how to behave." 

Sugawara let out a little gasp. "When I was talking about confessions, that's not what I had in mind." 

"Yes, it's like they're proposing all over again!" Oikawa had to hide his little smile behind his hand while Daichi was discreetly wiping away his tears. 

"I wonder what y'all will look like at the actual marriage." Yahaba joked which costed him to be shoved at by a teary Sugawara. 

"Ok, mine!" Oikawa cleared his throat and straightened up. "Sometimes, I have to confess, it gets quite hard to watch you act all lovey-dovey. You know, romantic feelings are not easy for me to comprehend and I feel like I do not deserve it sometimes? No no, Suga-chan keeps your teary eyes away! … as I was saying, romantic feelings are hard to grasp for me but…before coming here, I finally confessed to Iwa-chan! I told him about how much I cared about him, how much I wanted us to be in a relationship but that it would be a hard time and he could feel rejected and all… Guess what he answered!"

"He turned you down and rejected you because he doesn't love you at all?" Yahaba ironized. 

"Wrong, Ya-chan!" Oikawa huffed, clearly refusing to acknowledge his friend's irony. "Of course he accepted it and we agreed to go at proper pace that is comfortable for us! We even sleep in the same bed, huddled and all without me freaking out about it!"

Kuroo let out a whistle, still curled around his fiance. Daichi had a big smile on his face, his tears now dried up. 

"I guess it's my turn!" All eyes went quickly to Sugawara. "Uh, since I have basically nobody in my life except you lot, or more appropriately a bunch of idiots… I wanted to let you guys know that I found what I want to do with my life. Because, as you know, I didn't have the opportunity to finish my studies and without Daichi and Oikawa, who knows where I'd be… After so much struggling, I managed to find a job as a teacher in an elementary school! I have to give some exams but I'm really motivated and I'm going to give my best, thanks to y'all."

"Suga-chan.." Oikawa took his friend's hand between his own and started to engulf him in a hug. 

"I think you'll be perfect, since you seem to deal well with these children." Shirabu said, quietly with a little smile on his face. Sugawara beamed at him and gave him a nod. 

Then, suddenly, everyone was looking at him gently. Yahaba let go of Sugawara to steady his composure. "Well, as you may know, since Kuroo can't keep his mouth shut, I broke up with my boyfriend three weeks ago. And, as you also know, it's mostly a good thing since I didn't have much liberty or freedom in the relationship and it was toxic as fuck." Yahaba chuckled bitterly. "But I would like to thank you guys for taking the time to visit me, for finding excuses to take me out and for trying to let me see how much our relationship was twisted. And, thank you Kuroo, because even if we are not roommates anymore, you're still here doing your best, even at the expense of your own life. So yeah… thanks."

Silence greeted him for a moment before Kuroo spoke up. "No need to thank me, you're like the little brother I never had, Shigeru."

Honestly, as if that confession wasn't enough, Yahaba started to tear up silently. Nobody tried to hug him; they knew better, choosing to support him with their silence and presence instead. 

When Oikawa felt it had been long enough, his attention turned towards their guide. "Ah, and you Shirabu-chan? You need to confess something too! After all, it's only fair…"

"Please, tell us Shirabu, we are eager to hear your story!" Sugawara got a little bit closer, while passing his arms around Yahaba. 

"Once, I had to hide exactly like this during a snowstorm, except I was alone. So, uh, I'm kind of afraid of the dark, now? And the snow?" Shirabu's cheeks turned redder, embarrassed. Even if Kuroo chuckled lightly, nobody asked him for more. They knew how to respect a man's privacy when it was needed. 

So, the night continued. Their voices talking quietly and them falling asleep one by one.

But, Shirabu and Yahaba couldn't sleep. 

After hearing Daichi's soft snores, Yahaba was sure that everyone was fast asleep. He also knew he had all the time he needed to talk with their guide. He swiftly detached himself from Sugawara's sleeping form and got closer to Shirabu. He watched the fire dance in his eyes before breaking it's spell. He wanted to know more. 

"You want to know, right?" He jolted a little bit, surprised to hear this honest thought. 

But, when he looked at Shirabu, he only saw a sheepish smile. "I don't mind. After all, you all have talked about some personal parts of your lives. I just thought you didn't want to know…" A silence fell between them for a few minutes. 

"I was born in Hokkaido. I grew up with other children running, throwing each other in the snow and getting reprimanded for the mess." He let a silence, again. "There was this boy named Eita. We were always bickering but he was my closest friend. We had a habit of meeting every night to play and talk about our day but, one night, when I get out, he wasn't there. I knew something was not normal; he was supposed to be there or he would have told me. I was young and I thought that something could have probably kept him at home. So, I started to look for him but his mom told me he wasn't at home. I searched for him, despite the snowstorm coming. I had to hide in a garden shed. But, when the lightning lit up the room, I saw Eita's cold body outside the shed, his lips and fingers blue. He was dead. I spent the whole night crying over his fragile body. Later, I learned he had died in the snowstorm: he had tripped and had broken his ankle, he had no other choice than to wait for death, buried under the cold. Since that day, I can't stand the darkness."

Out of breath, Shirabu had lowered his head, his hair falling in front of his face. Yahaba came closer to him and put his head on his shoulder. Tentatively, an arm made its way around his own middle and soon cries were muffled in his coat. They spent the night, hugging each other and talking about their inner demons. 

But, they also talked about casual things; favorite childhood memories, how they had ended up in hospital while being children, Yahaba's studies and Shirabu's lack of opportunity to follow classes, the loss of their loved ones, their first pet. Maybe they talked about their expectations. At some point, Yahaba lost the count of all the topics they talked about. They seemed to fit like two magnets. Silence never felt on them. 

By the time the sun went up, Yahaba and Shirabu didn't even get an ounce of sleep through the night. But they definitely felt stronger. 

It was only when Yahaba found the warmth of Oikawa's and Sugawara's bodies under their comforter, that Yahaba thought again of the way back to the lodge. 

They had to make their way through the snow blocking the entry of the cave. Of course, there had been some arguing: nobody had wanted to get cold or to admit they might end up stuck in the cave. But, calmly, and probably being a little bit sleepy, Shirabu had removed the snow efficiently. Turned out this wasn’t rarely dramatic. 

“Wow, Shirabu-chan, you are so cool! You’re like our protector!”

“Shut up, please, it’s not even 7am and I didn’t have my morning cup of coffee.”

“No need to be this salty… Maybe you should have slept instead of playing Romeo…”

They had snickered making Yahaba and Shirabu blush deeply. No need to say they both had started to walk in the direction of the Mountain peak. It had been decided that they will pursue their ascension; no need to ruin their fabulous bonding time. After all, Shirabu assured them they will be at the lodge at night if their started to hike at the start of the day. 

None of them regretted their decision. The sight had been beautiful and peaceful. Rocked gently by the wind, they all had stood close to each other. Silence was the only music that accompanied their contemplation. There was a silent promise made to each other; to never forget the bond they shared and how they had each other’s backs. They would be sturdy as a rock and as gentle as the snow whitening the Mountains peak. Everything was going to be okay.

Nobody said anything when Kuroo started to cry; they all knew how _sappy_ he was. Not to mention, they had little tears in their own eyes too. 

When they had started to descend the Mountain, a snowball fight ensued. Oikawa had cried when Sugawara put snow in his beanie. Daichi had almost buried Kuroo in snow after his lame attempts at acting cool. He had also threatened Oikawa and Sugawara for giggling. Yahaba had even thrown some balls himself; one hitting Shirabu right in the face. Their guide, far from being thrilled, had crafted his own ammunition before shooting back. Chaos had ensued; snow was stuck in their clothes and they were freezing. But what mattered the most was that they were also laughing. 

Yahaba had never felt this good for a long time. As they finally reached their lodge, Shirabu caught his hand, halting him where he stood and successfully stopping his discourse on Neptune. Yahaba was deeply caught up in his explanation on how in one month, Neptune would stop being visible and this would be irrevocable in two years. 

“Yahaba, I’m sorry to cut you short but…”

“But?” Yahaba didn't say anything about the cute blush on Shirabu’s cheeks. 

“I know you just got out of a relationship but, uh, would you like to go get coffee some day?”

“Uh, yeah sure.”

“You know I’m asking you on a date right now?”

“I was hoping you were doing so.” Yahaba had winked. 

Then, before Shirabu could have replied, because Yahaba knew it was going to get absolutely embarrassing if he would have, he stepped closer. And, quietly, the wind gently ruffling their hair, Yahaba had kissed Shirabu. It had been quick, sure, but the smiles on their faces said how much it had been real. 

Yahaba stepped away then, the blush deeper on his cheeks. “I will not forget, Kenjirou. I want to get this coffee.” Saying so, Yahaba entered the lodge, leaving a dumbstruck Shirabu behind.

Two weeks later, Shirabu was visiting Tokyo for the first time and Yahaba was waiting for him on the platform. 


End file.
